In a culture that screams “Yes” to every one and everything that the world has to offer, I am a mean mom that says “No” quite often.
“No” to ideology that says truth is relative.
“No” to many movies, music and moments that turn the brain to mush.
“No” to the laziness and disrespect that teens exhibit way too often.
“No” to…well, I guess you get the picture.
The hard reality is that I want to be a “Yes Mom. ” I want to say “yes” to everything that they desire. I want them to shower me with instant praise and gratitude for always saying “yes.”
I don’t want to be the only mom who doesn’t let them…
But, guess what? The Lord has graciously given these blessings to us for a minuscule period and I know that “instant yes” is not always in their best interest.
So I choose to be a “Yes Mom” in the little things. The moments that will impact them for eternity. Moments that shape who they are. I say “yes” to the little things that take their breath away, and then even moments that will be solidified in their mind as plain, silly, wholesome fun.
My desire is that they will always remember me as a “Yes Mom.” A mom who cares enough to say “No” in the hard moments, but relish my “Yes” in the magical ones.
So instead of saying, “No, don’t try on those crazy wigs, you’ll get lice,”
I just said “YES.”
Decades from now, I pray that my daughters and nieces will always remember this “Yes Moment.”
Have you had a “Yes Moment” lately?
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2 cute! Great post….. I love it! The picture says it all…. I'm sure your children will always look back on this Yes Moment!
Love,
Traci
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Yes to cuddling!
Yes to tickling!
Yes to an original bedtime story!
Yes to playing another game together!
You are so inspiring…thanks!
-Melissa
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Love the new look – it's a keeper.
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Ha, that's hilarious, I love it!
Shannon
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Jen, I just love your heart! I know that you are a wonderful mama & they will thank you later.
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I appreciate the times my mom said "No" and know that my kids do to. Sometimes kids want you to say "No".
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I share your philosophy. I try to say "Yes" as much as possible so that when I say "No" I don't encounter as much drama. I think it works.
"Yes, you may have extra cherries. Yes, you may play with the hose. Yes, you may run around the house in just your underwear if you really want to. No, you may not watch TV all day"
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Love the look!
I just said yes, and now my children are out playing in a downpour.
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YES, ma'am you are a ROCKIN' mamma.
Suzanne
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Your children are so blessed to have a 'NO' mom when it matters and a 'YES' mom when it counts!!
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Lovely reminder! I want to be more of a "yes" mom in all the right ways!
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I wrote a post about this same thing a several months ago. I am a NO mom trapped in a YES mom's body. I want to be a "yes" mom. I really do. Tonight I said yes to popcorn, ice cream and TV. And I joined them.
Great picture.
Sandy
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WOWSERS!!! You look great as a brunette and a blonde! You're so fun!
We were just talking about being a yes mom in our bible study last night. Great minds think alike!
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I love the "new" look! LOL!
It sounds like you are a great Mom!
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Oh dear. I am sorry that happened but you were indeed brave to let them try. And no, I am not a yes Mom, and I do not feel guilty about it, my job is to steward them safely and intelligently into adulthood, which means "let's try something different," is a regular part of speech now because "no," is more harsh than I can stomach saying 3000 times a day! Be well.
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LOL I love the picture!!
Yes! I'm a yes Mom {sometimes} – most recently my youngest daughter(13) and I were at the mall and we had a blast trying on 6" stiletto platform heals ($20 at some clothing store) – it was SO funny we had a blast……..and leg cramps the rest of the day.
~TidyMom
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This was such an encouraging post! I think I might go paint my toe nails blue with my girls!!
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LOVE that photo!!! Priceless…should be your new profile pic.
I need to work on being a "Yes, Mom!!!"
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Awesome. I feel like such a mean mom and mine aren't even teens yet. And I'm learning to say yes more to the crazy and inconvenient requests…I still have a long way to go. Thank you for the encouragement!
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This is the stress, overwhelmedness, & pure stresss of my exsistance right now. My 3 teens & I are in CONSTANT conflict about this very thing. I was just asking God & my husband why… Why can't I just be ok w/ saying no & not care about their disrespectful & angry reaction? After a while I get in this pit of depression because it seems like I never get a break from it. Sorry. Its just intresting to read this on the heels oof my crying out to God about this VERY thing!! Thanks for the perspective!
LA
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The other night it was ungodly hot and humid and everything in my kitchen required some degree of cooking. IT was too hot to turn an oven on or stand over a hot stove. When I asked the girls what they wanted for dinner that was cool, they asked for ice cream.
I said yes.
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I don't believe in saying yes to a child just so they will like you. People need to realize that saying yes to everything they want isn't the answer. That just creates lots of problems later on. My dad did that and now my brother doesn't want to be around him because he never bothered to set boundaries.
He respects my mom because she loves him enough to tell him no. My generation thinks they should get everything they want when they want it. What happened to having values? Great post.
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I think saying yes to the wigs was fine. It was a great memory for them.
You just have to find that delicate balance, which only happens with God's help.
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I really enjoyed reading this post…. what an encouragement for a mom of 3 little ones, who sometimes wonders what in the world God was thinking when he gave them to me…Thanks for helping sort out some of the mess of "good" motherhood. Peace.
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It's SO YOU!!! Love it!
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Great post! My parents raised us with the philosophy of saying yes to as much as they could because there would be plenty of things they would need to say no to. It was a great way to grow up. Kelly
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I am a "NO" mom all the way…only on the stuff that really matters, though.
Love you in that ghetto fabulous wig! Brave woman.
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Cute post!
YES to hoses and mud (even tho it makes a horrific mess)
YES to ice cream before bedtime.
YES to streaking after bathtime
YES to the 3 year old who wants to wear her footie P.J's to the supermarket.
I too want to be a YEs Mom more! I just try to pick my battles.
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Jen, you are amazing. I love this post.
I am right there with you…I want my kids to have a "yes" mom most of the time.
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