Whether it be in books or blogs, inevitably there is a a section that encourages us to cultivate our master bedroom, and bath into a sanctuary…a beautiful, private haven.
So far, the haven of hospitality area doesn’t really extend to my bedroom (…at least for outsiders :). In fact, the intended encouragement from those books always draws out a different kind of effect….chastisement.
Yes, I know we spend 1/3 of our lives in bed. Yes, I acknowledge that my goal as our family manager means I need to create this place as a private sanctuary….a respite for my husband after a long work day, a place of refuge – one that summons peace. I can write about it, dream about, desire it….
I know all about it, but it hasn’t fully happened – yet – eventually it will.
Right now it is still our Laundry Central. It’s the catch all for the entire house, and besides the fact that I can smell the savory scent of fabric softener, that’s the extent of letting the five senses guide me in that part of the ‘haven.’
So when I started chuckling loudly in bed while reading (wait…that means I do have a place of rest and refuge – I still read in bed most nights), I thought I would share the ironic amusement that I gathered about my haven.
“One way to think of your bedroom is as a special secret place in your life, almost as though you have to travel to get here. Once you’ve arrived, you’re alone and calm, (ha), and you can shed your cares and your clothes (double ha). Look around, imagine and describe what you would envision there….set the stage for bed by having a few practical luxuries at hand. An attractive, accurate alarm clock is a necessity….”
Yep, got that going for me, I must work on the remainder of the untyped paragraph.
“Build in enough time to spend a few minutes straightening up the bathroom for your partner.
“check to be sure there is plenty of toilet paper“ (yes, it really says that, and I am so glad that I could oblige). One of the favorite things my kids love to do is build our toilet paper mountain in my bathroom. We have a separate room where the toilet stands, and I do believe my husband was the first one to start this TP concept. )
There is definitely modern art found in this sculpture, isn’t there?
Next, she points out,” fold the towels and hang them.”I know, it’s a fairly basic household requirement, but somehow…..hmmm….
“Have designated towel bars for you and your partner so your wet towels won’t be reused by mistake.”
“Wipe off the counter and mirror.”
Those of you with teens will chuckle, the rest will go running for the hills in disgust. Right before I read this, my teen was standing in this very bath, looking in the mirror….popping his zits.
There was a huge explosion, and then….a dirty mirror. (I could make this section into a hysterical paragraph explaining in detail the conversation that ensued between said son and myself, but I will keep it in the mystery realm. Let’s just say that testosterone was flying.)
I do want you to know that I am a fairly classy kind of a gal in real life, but some things just need to be shared for full effect, especially since I was already laughing at each little sentence thinking “blog post”, and the irony of my bedroom/bath haven.
Oops….picture purposely missing to save said son’s respect, and his friend that reads this blog :).
“Have specific concealed places for your necessities.”
I guess using my door doesn’t really conceal my necessities, does it? Some habits are hard to break.
“The only think we need near the sink is the toothpaste, toothbrushes, and dental floss and I keep them in a polished silver baby cup in a near by cupboard.
We never keep any functional items such as toothbrushes, razors, deodorants…visible.
Our mouthwashes, green Scope and red Lavoris, are in attractive cut crystal decanters adding color to our green tiled counter top.
(For sake of preserving my self dignity, these pictures will also not be posted. Please note that crystal decanters are NOT used for any type of mouthwash:)
“Make an evening ritual of setting the stage for intimacy. Light a scented candle, an incense stick, or a ring scented with oil, and imagine yourself in the South of France. Turn down the bed.”
Hmmm….fragrance – do you think this will put him in the mood?
(Seriously, nothing was moved for sake of blog post…unfortunately)
“One can unwind and be calm in a room on the cool side of the spectrum-pale pink, lilac, silver, sea foam green, pale blue….select your favorite cool tones, and avoid bright yellow, red and orange – colors that make one feel more active….have lots of fresh down pillows in various sizes and shapes, collect pretty pillow shams, vary your sheets and pillowcases each week….”
Well, two out of five ain’t bad. 🙂
And my yummy pale yellow coverlet was a Good will find for $5. It makes me SO happy.
Remember the large amounts of laundry in my “to do” list…well, my matching sheets were part of that. At least I have the cozy fabric down….who says that fabrics have to match, and I am an active person, so reds and bright greens do work…hee hee,
“Conjure up images of beauty from your memory and then physically and symbolically go about bringing the elements together in the space you’ve set aside for your bedroom.”
I don’t think she meant this, but nothing conjures up images of beauty from my memory more than some beautiful bling bought at bedlam, bare bone yard sale prices.
Trust me, I can share some great memories with each piece worn. 🙂 That’s surely symbolic.
Now off to “Do the next thing.”
I often find that when life sends one a few curves, taking time to absorb the bedlam, laughing about it (and frankly…laughing at oneself) and then getting on, getting on to beautifying the bedlam that needs some work… is healthy.
Love this! Just brought a smile to my face as I can totally relate… Too cute!!!
What a fun post! 🙂 A crystal decanter…seriously?? Haven’t heard of that one before. 🙂
Oh gosh yes – our room and bathroom is the one place that never looks like I want it. When guests come over, I usually have to shut the door.
Thanks for the great laugh.
You are too funny.
Thanks for keeping it real.
That was so perfect—because it was so real!
My bedroom is pretty nice—but my bathroom. Well, I’d say it was your bathroom’s long lost twin :).
You do still manage to get the balance right!
You’re a gem.
I love how honest you are.
You’ve inspired me to be honest about my messy zone. I’ll have to do a post on that soon.
Hugs!!!
Thanks for the laughs because you are SO honest!
I don’t know what my favorite part is though… the mountain of toilet paper or the “necessities” hanging from your door.
I too am thankful for grace and unconditional love and acceptance!
You’re a hoot, Jen. Thanks for the laughs! See you tonight.
The toliet paper sculpture would be a prime target for my 4 year old. HA! And luckily the dog has grown out of tearing up the toliet paper.
But the world is a better place when my bed is made….that’s my ONLY requirement for the bedroom.
haha – i can’t even begin to express the bedlam in my bedrooms.
thanks for the funny post!
Oh what a beauiful post! Yes, our Savior accepts us regardless of everything we come with, includeing all our imperfections.
I enjoyed this post and the toilet paper pyramid photo. It’s safe to say your family won’t be running out soon! 🙂
This post had me smiling so much! The toilet paper mountain, the zit-popping, the Ben-gay; but the funniest thing to me was when I went back to check out what stuff you had on your bedside table only to realize that I’ve had that exact magazine and that exact book (that IS The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency isn’t it?) on MY night stand!
I’ve got bras and bengay in the same places!!
You are hilarious! Honestly, your “realness” is so refreshing!
I am so glad you are a real person! LOL
For me it is after Sunday that the house goes caput. I really don’t know how it happens.
Thanks for the smile and laughs!
After falling out laughing, I share your pain in this area. I can relate on so many levels here, other than the TP tower. We don’t have room in our toilet closet for that. I can say my hall bathroom is nice and inviting.LOL
Jen, you're so real & that's why we all stop by to see you. Real life is good!
oh my goodness that is such an AMERICAN concept! I laughed while reading this because most parents who live in flats overseas let their children all share 1 small room and the parent sleep on the couch that converts into the bed for them…and then the bathroom is just one shared by all… you laughed for different reasons than me…but I still found it funny.
Don’t get me wrong I would LOVE to have what that woman was describing but I think you need to be childless and in a nice home in America for that!
Thanks for making me laugh… and you are great Jen! I LOVED the toilet paper art!!!
So good to see you Saturday!!! I hope you are recovering from all the madness!
You are just too funny! So real…have you been in my room????
-sandy toes
I can’t stand it when my master bed/bath is unorganized-I feel crazy! Trust me-there are other rooms that have “a laundry basket” of junk to put away…You are keeping it real-and I admire you for it…and I love your guest goats, and horses! I know they won’t care!
oh I think you’llfind quite a ew of us that strugglwe in this area, I totally admire your honesyt, thats why I luv ya!!! Your gonna kick this, just wait and see!! 😉 LA
I am sooooo glad I’m not the only one!!!!!!! Thank you for making me feel less guilty lol
That was so great! I’ve been reading for a while but haven’t posted until today–and I had to post!! How I can relate. I have about 6 bras hanging on my bathroom doorknob…I don’t even wear half of them.:) That tp tower wouldn’t be such a good idea with the boys in my house. Even my 10-yr-old still has aim issues…
What a fun read! :o) I am too practical for my own good. :o) And so not perfect. How the Lord loves me as He does will remain a mystery for the rest of my life.
Sincerely ~ Tricia Anne
Great post! I *try* to keep the bedroom a nice haven of comfort–but sometimes life overtakes things and it becomes a haven for laundry!
And I have always maintained that the key to a good marriage is SEPARATE bathrooms!!
Thanks for stopping by my blog yesterday!!
Oh, girl, I am SO with you on this one! haha!!! 🙂 Our bedroom has always been the “pile zone”, the room that has to be closed off when houseguests come. Not quite sure how that happens, but it always does! I also dry my…ahem…undergarments :)…on the doorknob, too! Seems like the perfect spot to me!! I actually think that the TP mountain is genious, and I’ll tell you why…nothing kills any hope of a romantic mood more than having to yell across the house for your spouse to bring more TP cause you didn’t realize there was none left till you already did your bid’ness! TP mountain available…no problem! 🙂
Thanks for your honesty!!! Maybe you should do a linky with everyone posting their worst pile zone pics! We can all commiserate together! haha
Stacey
This was so funny – I have two laundry baskets behind my door – you’d think after all the work to fold the stuff I would want to put it away before it gets knocked over…and the pile off books? It’s teetering at about two feet high. A few weeks ago I posted a photo of my messy room – still wondering why I did that.
LOL! I personally love the TP sculpture!
Did you get my e-mail about the package – I just want to assure you that I did get it and I love it!
I was laughing out loud with your son’s “explosions” Too funny!!
Crystal decanter?? I am lucky enough to remember to buy TP none the less crystal decaters of mouthwash. My mom is kinda like that though…..but neither my sister or I?? Wonder where that gene went??
Oh my, this hilarious! Thank you for being so open!
Funny, I have my bras drying out where everyone can see them in my mudd room.
I am so glad I found you! (Thanks to The Inspired Room blog) I love your sense of humor and your honesty, and how our Savior is such a part of everything you do.
Thank you for the smiles this morning!
Oh how I love you! I laughed and nodded my head through this whole post because our bedroom is the EXACT same way. It is where everything lands. UGH. I am so glad to know that I’m not alone..and yet again, I wish you lived next door!
Oh how I adore you. I mean, really adore you. In a totally irrational, unhealthy sort of way. Well, I guess it’s not all that unhealthy. 🙂
You are a riot! I can especially relate to the bras on the doorknob. Is there any other place to dry them? If you put them in the dryer all the padding gets bunched up and, Lord knows, I need my mounds of padding to look normal cuz that’s all I’ve got if you know what I mean! The doorknob is where I dry them all except for the time my daughter put a drying rack on the deck and hung my bras on it. I’m sure the neighbors were thrilled especially since I didn’t discover it until well into the day!
I love that you hang your bras on the door handle. It reminds me of the time my 6yo tried to pull his first tooth by hooking my bra to said tooth and slamming the door! 😀
Ah yes, the teenager and then there is also the 7 year old boy who would somehow turn the tower of tp into a yellow soggy mess.
Amen sister.