My husband flippantly mentioned something about us being “middle aged.”
I gasped, “What are you talking about? I am not middle aged! I feel so young.”
His eyebrows raised and while attempting to avoid a mind field reaction, he kindly replied, “Ah, hon, what do you think you are? You have a son who’s almost twenty.”
I chuckled with the startling realization, but warn you all, it’s just not worth having a child when you’re ten. 😉
The idea of pushing the “publish” button on a series which names me as a Mentor Mom terrifies me. There’s a reason I haven’t gotten into the nitty gritty of mothering here on the blog over the last few years.
I am in process, making mistakes, and learning more and more each day. Our children are in process, making mistakes, and learning more and more each day.
I need my own mentor mom (and have one – a rare gift that it’s my own mother), so how can I possibly be one to others? The Lord convicted me of that mentality and urged me to just open up.
I do not have all the answers and if anyone tells you that they do, don’t listen to them, but I am here, in the throws of it with five children (19, 18, 16, 14 and 10.) I’ve learned some hard life lessons along the way, but I am also reaping the blessed joy of older children making wise choices. (Well today anyhow, tomorrow may be a different story. :))
I’m here with children making a mark on the world, and women asking me to walk alongside them.
There’s no formula for that and I continually feel inadequate, but I know that I show up, day in and day out, doing the really hard stuff, whether those blessings of mine want me to or not, and it’s paying off.
So sweet friends, I am your open book to ask anything you ever wanted to know about mothering over the next 31 days because I’m kicking off 31 Days with a Mentor Mom.
I know there are so many options out there, but I want this to be a time that feeds your soul, encourages you, and possibly opens up your mothering to varying ideas.
I want us to dialogue because there’s no “one” way to mother, and it’s ok to disagree with me. I love when iron sharpens iron.
My role is to cheer you on because this is so worth it and we are on this journey together. I want us to remember that amidst every diaper changed, every tantrum soothed, every cookie baked, every tear cried, every curfew broken, it’s worth it!
For the most parts, my posts will be more light hearted and short. I know time is precious, but here are just a few of the topics I am debating because one thing this mentor mom does not do well is planning really far in advance. 🙂
Our biggest parenting struggle, What I did (and do) for our whiny children, dealing with picky eaters, you say he’s shy, I say he’s rude, polishing the pearls amongst the pandemonium of entitlement, Christmas shopping, should my boys play football, talking to kids about sex, my views on postponing “dating,” our 17 year old son’s transition from home school life to public school, kingdom purpose mothering, family traditions, and… I am open to more ideas.
I am thrilled you are here and can’t wait to journey alongside you.
P.S. This is the 4th year I am joining the Nester in our 31 Days series. Time has flown!
I am also tackling 31 Days of C.O.S.T. Cooking meals (cook once, serve twice or three times) over at 10 Minute Dinners. Join me over there for some easy dinners solutions.
Sounds great Jen!
I know just what you mean, Jen! I don’t FEEL middle-aged! Some days I don’t even feel like I’m completely grown up! But I turned 50 this year. What, am I planning to live past age 100?? And my kids are 22, 20, and 16.
I think you’re a great mentor mom. You’re just what a mentor should be–still growing and learning yourself. Who would want to be mentored by a mom who’s perfect?? That would be depressing, not uplifting! 🙂
hi sweet friend – you are right there with me and I know you are a GREAT mom. (If you have any desire to do a guest post for this series, I’d love it.) 🙂
Oh, am I looking forward to this! We have had several of the problems you have just listed, and we are still having them.
I’m really looking forward to this series!! I have daughters who are almost thirteen and eleven, so any advice you can offer for these days where my little girls are becoming “big” girls – and all the hormones/moodiness/friendship issues, etc, that seem to frequently come with the territory – would be greatly appreciated!!
I hear you. Mothering is definitely on the job training with no operating instructions! I think maybe a post on how you make the parenting choices you do (or intentionally choose not to make) — your inspiration and life resources, such as your parents, friends, church, media, etc. You may draw on resources some of your readers, especially young mothers, might not have considered.
Some things we’ve been going through – teenage depression, finding appropriate consequences for older children, fighting siblings, when to intervene/advocate for your child, responsibility and doing hard things.
I couldnt be more excited for this 🙂 cant wait to follow along!
You have a beautiful family. My sons (ages 42 and38 ) are raised and gone from home but I am raising two teen grandchildren. I want to follow along and see what I can learn. It is hard to mother sometimes when I am so much older than their friends mothers
Oh, Jen! New found friend and fellow football fan, I’m so excited to follow these 31 days and learn from you! I have loved even as a child, sitting with my mom and her sisters as they talked about just normal, every day things. But, to me, it was eye-opening to the “grown-up” world. I still feel as if I’m a little girl half the time, wondering if I’m doing this parenting thing or wife thing or friend thing “right”. So much mommy guilt as a working mom, and I don’t know how to deal with it. Kids are in daycare and pre-K, while I work a 40+ hour week in 4 days and go to school on Fridays at UNCG. Then, supporting and encouraging my husband in the midst of this is sometimes put on the back burner. We, as a couple, have an extremely hard time growing our relationship in this chaotic life. Whew! Looking forward to your posts!
Jen, you’re so brave to tackle 31 days! Just the thought of that commitment of time with everything else going on in my life has kept me joining. Maybe next year!
I would love to know more about persevering through hard times with your kids. You know we have adopted and bio kids and we hit a huge bump in the road as they hit 9th grade. We are still homeschooling, but some days it has been by the sheer grit and determination.
I’m sure the series will be amazing. I’m 51 and still think I’m about 30 until I look in the mirror!
This is a wonderful series! I am expecting my first child, a baby boy, in December so any advice for first time Mom’s would be so appreciated!
Thank you so much for doing this series! I am in the middle of the child-raising season (preparing for the 3rd to arrive in 6 days!), so any advice I can get on how to mother well, I am all ears 🙂 I love reading your blog & hearing your perspective, not only on mothering, but other life subjects as well. Thanks again!
oh, it’s you! we’ve met at blossom-but i’m sure you met many there. love your topic and your comments above. you have a beautiful family. looking forward to following along~
Time is going to fast that I can’t believe my age and the thought of middle aged never even dawned on me, I am right there with you. I would like to know how you deal possibly with your children’s low self esteem issues among their peers. The other is my youngest son is very introverted and doesn’t talk hardly at all, if there is a way to get him to talk without having to ask
so many questions to get a response. I am looking forward to reading all of you 31 days, you always have such great ideas and solutions. I really enjoy your blog.
So excited for this series! My kids are 11 and 8: one very sensitive boy and one sweet strong-willed girl. Advice on how to encourage independence, guiding a strong personality, and encouraging obedience would be helpful. 🙂 Thanks!
Hi there! My sister told me about your site and your “31 Days” mentor mom series coming up. She said it sounded like it will be so good, and I agree! God has blessed us with a sweet boy who is 5 and a precious baby girl who is 6 months old.
I love the list of topics you hope to cover, and I was wondering if you might add another to the list. My son just turned 5 and we are just beginning to deal with negative outside influence in the way of friends. We homeschool him (not for the purpose of sheltering him!) and we are his primary influence but there are lots of neighborhood children…some nice and some not-so-nice that are frequently all in the same group running around and playing outside. Any advice? : ) Thank you so much for your willingness to share what you have learned and help those of us who are still in the early years of mothering.
Love this! I plan to check in often! As a mom of a 10 & 12 year old, I’m needing a mentor mom for these years ahead! 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
You are AMAZING! Even I feel like I could use a mentor mom and I’m 42! No woman or mom is perfect or has all the right answers. We just need someone to tell us we’re not a total mess and encourage us to keep trying our best. I’m excited for your series! I can’t think of a more lovely, and real lady to lead this! Love you my friend!!!
Yay! You’re doing it! Can’t wait to read and learn. Love you, friend!
having just spent the morning pleading with jesus to give me some direction on how to manage the bickering between my six your old girl and four year old boy….i am truly excited about this series! any tips you can give me regarding the afore mentioned morning would be welcome with open arms and buckets of chocolate.
I would love any and all input on how to stay fed spiritually…so very hungry in these days with 3 kids ages 5 and under.
Followed you for a while now and excited for this series. I find in ministry that women are in need of mentor, more than ever before! As (older) women who have walked down a few roads, we can prayerfully guide these women to all that God has for them! Blessed to follow along! My series is on parenting tweens and teens! Be blessed!
This is great! I am so here! With four boys under 10, I need all the help I can get. 🙂
Last year I was asked to lead our Mentor Moms for the MOMS group I belonged to. That’s when I looked around the room and realized I am indeed of mentor mom age! My kids are 21, 11, 9 and 6 after all.
I love this idea and I look forward to following along.
Sounds great! I have an 8 and 10 year old… so we are just getting to the age where I am starting to be convinced that I am indeed messing my kids up 😉 Look forward to stopping by to check out your posts!
yes, please! What I did (and do) for our whiny children, dealing with picky eaters, you say he’s shy, I say he’s rude, polishing the pearls amongst the pandemonium of entitlement YES! PLEASE! I just found your blog and I am thankful for you already
I think that it is great that you are going to post on these topics and more mothering issues. Just because you are still “in it” doesn’t mean that you don’t have some great insights to share. Thank you for following the leading that God has laid on your heart to do this. I will look forward to reading.
I am not accepting that you are middle aged. If that’s true then I am ancient! Love this series Jen. Your honesty and openness will reach many people, including me.